Customers Respond to the Pappy Games
We have one entry already. Tim from Los Angeles. In his request, he wrote:
David To The North,
I write you regarding your Pappy Van Winkle allocation.
I would link you to the copious photos of my endless hoard of Pappy, all years and all expressions, but I believe that those who flaunt do not have a true understanding of what it means to TRULY hoard. I have accumulated vast numbers of bottles - so many that I could kill the entire state of California with alcohol poisoning six times over - that spill out from five or six storage units in Los Angeles. I do not post photos because my hoard is not to be seen by human eyes. In fact, I believe that the mere light of my iPhone's camera can irreversibly taint the delicate molecules of alcohol. Thus, all of my bottles are stored in their velvet bags, inside styrofoam containers, double boxed, double taped and then wrapped with kraft paper. The storage units are secured with a Mul-T-Lok which is bump-proof and pick-resistant. I have no intention of ever drinking any of this fine whiskey; I only get enjoyment from an ever-increasing stash of it.
I tell you this because I believe you are the only whisky merchant who would have an appreciation as to why it's so important that this whiskey is appropriately hoarded. I do not buy it for investment or speculative value; I buy it merely to own it and not drink it. (This is similar to my viewpoint on many items I own - I also bought our kitchen table for the sole purpose of ownership and it is strictly NOT TO BE EATEN UPON).
Finally, I find it important to tell you that I trained with world-renowned Serge of the Valentins and he gave me a 93, adding, "thanks for the sample, Steffen!".
While we have yet to review Tim officially, he appears to be a fierce contestant. When the Pappy Games finally begin, they will function as follows: we will set all 24 contestants in front of a computer, linking them to the K&L website. We will put the bottles on sale at a specific time and the participants must move quickly to login, add the bottles to their cart, then check out as quickly as possible. All contestants will be wearing a destructive collar around their neck while typing. Those who check out successfully and win the bottle of Pappy will live to drink their award. Those who fail to check out in time will have their head exploded by the collar.
Good luck to all those who play, and may the odds ever be in your favor.